Kate Middleton is Naked

The world awoke to the shocking news that Kate Middleton, the Duchess of Cambridge is, beneath all those beautiful clothes….. naked.

This fact has been pointed out to us by the French ‘Closer” magazine, which has carried out this marvelous public service, benefiting the world. Editor of the magazine Mademoiselle Dumarse said “I can’t see that we have done anything wrong” ….. and that my fellow non French citizens is why they should have never done away with the guillotine.

Kate Middleton with clothes onAs the wife of our future King, we thought it apt to show her fully clothed, even though all you dirty so and so’s know know that underneath that pretty dress, she hasn’t got anything on… I mean its scandalous isn’t it?

Men in some sections of society have known for several months that in certain circumstances women are naked beneath their clothes, in some cases as the day they were born…… and very often shameless about it too, showing off their hoohar’s as well as their nipnips.

Personally I feel sorry for the poor photographer in France who was unfortunate enough to find his eye line invaded by Kate sunbathing topless in the privacy of private grounds. Thankfully he just happened to have a massive telephone lens on his camera… you know the ones I mean….. all those…. what are they called…… pa…. pap…. papa….. arseholes have them.

You would think that the French would have learned their lesson after Diana’s death, but it looks like they want to hound Kate into an early grave too.

I say boycott everything french until they all apologise….. doors, toast, letters… the lot.

The Duke of Edinburgh was alleged to be thinking “Bloody cheese eating surrender monkeys… papping our Kate….. flog the buggers”, and probably “it’s not like she was caught banging a slapper on a billiard table, so let’s cut her some slack.”

We love you Kate… the french can all go Fuck themselves.

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