The legend of Gordon Brown

Just when we all thought it could get no worse for Gordon Brown, when it should technically be impossible for him to fuck up any further, he goes and fucks up much further.

Following the hoo haa regarding the one way gravy train that he and his witless cohorts are busy feasting upon, the hero of our tale, Gordon himself set about changing the system currently used by politicians to inflate their  meagre subsistence. This takes the form of a second home allowance, of up to £24,000 per year, for which our galant MP’s (several of which refer to themselves as honourable) have to provide receipts.
In effect this led to many MP’s refering to first homes as second homes as first homes. Even the Home Secretary (correct as we went to press on the 29-04-09 but likely to change at any moment)  called a bedsit she shares for four noghts a week with her sister in London her first home, while the country house with her husband, children dog etc ….. oh yes….. and the much bigger mortgage was her “Second Home” and as such eligible for an expenses claim. When questioned on the matter she said…… ” It is normal practice and is within the House of Commons rules. That it may well be, but as the linch pin of our judical system is it right that we have someone of such dubious moral backbone? Surely any decent human being in a position of trust would be aware of how that would look to the rest of the country?
Anyway,  back to the heroes tale of woe.
Gordon, when made aware of Rupert Murdock’s displeasure set about doing something to fix the sorry state of affairs. His solution was to instead give all Mp’s a daily payment of £170 just for dragging their sad, sorry, fat, lazy, pampered arses into the job that they are already getting paid for…… at an annual cost of £25,000 and on top of that they would no longer need to provide any expenses receipts, so would be free to squander this tax free windfall as they saw fit.
Gordon, they wrote a song about you back in the 70’s long before you rose to mediocrity…….. you might remember it…… it’s called “Gordon you’re  fuck witted fool with poor judgement”  
Not surprisingly this new brainwave has been dropped as of today, I am informed that Gordon is putting the finishing touches to his latest plan to cull all the over 70’s in an attempt to stop the swine flu outbreak. Expect a press release shortly.    

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